Like love and fear, ANGER is a normal human emotion. Everybody gets angry from time to time and for many different reasons.

How many times have you been angry because:

• You didn’t get what you wanted?
• Someone “played” you, “dissed” you, or hurt your feelings or made you look bad in front of other people?
• You or someone who matters to you was mistreated?
• You failed at something you thought you were smart enough or strong enough to have been able to do
• You got caught doing something you thought for sure you could get away with?

Mental health experts agree that whatever the reason, getting the anger OUT is much healthier than letting it stay BOTTLED UP inside you.

Look at it this way. If you cut your finger while trying to slice some bread or while working with a sharp tool , it’s a good idea to wash out the wound and put on a band aid to protect dirt from getting in and causing infection. ANGER is to the mind what a cut or wound is to the body. It, too, needs to be protected against infection. A good way to keep anger from infecting your whole body is to get it out in the open...to express it.  BUT – while it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to get anger out by using cruel words, fists, or other dangerous weapons, there are smart and productive ways to blow off steam. A better, safer way to vent is to be honest and use simple language:

• “You hurt my feelings when you called me a…AND I’m really angry at you.”
• “I feel like a real jerk when I do lots of stuff for you and then…, when I ask you to HELP ME OUT, you’re always too busy. It’s not FAIR…, me being the one who always has to do the work.”

Think back to the last time you got angry:

• Why did you become angry?
• What did you do about it?
• Did being angry cause you or someone else more pain?

Be honest now. Did VENTING your anger get you into more trouble than you started out with? Know why? Because you let your ANGER CONTROL YOU, rather than YOU CONTROLLING IT.

ANGER CONTROL, or what the books call “anger management” begins with thinking before you take action. It means LOOKING BEFORE YOU LEAP INTO GETTING YOUR ANGER OUT WITH your fists, your feet, a baseball bat, blade or gun.
A lot of people will tell you that actions speak louder than words.  Sometimes, that’s true. But when it comes to getting out your anger by controlling it rather than being dumb enough to let it control you, WORDS...words (simply telling how you feel and why) speak the loudest and safest of all.