The great news is that you don't have to be in the Olympics to find flow, or a sense of involvement in your life.  What I have discovered with my research with professional level athletes are some simple yet incredible ideas. 

One thing that is clear is that athletes need challenge.  That may sound like a clear statement but it's a necessary idea in order to understand flow.  Athletes not only need challenge, they survive on it.  It's the same for non-athletes.  As humans, we simply need challenge.  If we don't find challenges in our life, we grow lazy, and life becomes dull, uneventful, an effort.  When your mind, body, and spirit are challenged, you become involved in the process.  Challenge makes you sit up and take notice of what you are doing, where you are, and where you want to go. 

It's the challenge that drives true, top athletes.  Even if they were competing in a race against no one but themselves, it's the challenge of beating their own personal best that excites them and commits them to endless hours of training.  But to an athlete seeking to shave a few seconds off their time, they don't view those hours as endless and boring, it's all part of the thrill of the chase! 

There are three important issues here.  One, the athletes I've worked with and interviewed all see in themselves and are in touch with what it means and what it feels like to be engaged or immersed on an intellectual, physical, emotional, spiritual, and philosophical level.  When they felt that connection, it was hard, in fact, impossible, to accept anything less.  When they stepped away from their sports career, none of them decided to find an easy job.  They all took on careers that challenged them on one level or another.  They took skills that they had learned on the field of competition and used that in their new lives. 

Second, what also became clear was that it is extremely important to use their personal choice, to take responsibility for themselves, and to act on their own free will.  How could anyone feel confident in their life if they're not taking responsibility for who they are, for the choices they've made and the direction they're taking? 

Finally, from my research, it was found that these athletes have a level of commitment and passion that was essential to both discover and follow through with creating and keeping more than one engagement zone.  What do I mean by engagement zone?  I mean, that they didn't become completely focused on one part of their life; they found challenges and passions in a number of different areas. 

The lessons for you to take, then, are three basic ones. 

Challenge yourself.  You need to feel challenged in order to feel connected to what you're doing in life.  The foundation for your confidence comes from finding a sense of involvement in the process of living your life.  When you find challenges in your life, when you find ways to become involved in your life, this sense of involvement helps flow; that sense of ease. 

Take responsibility for where you are in life.  Set goals, and never give up on your dreams.  Do not accept second best. 

Find many different challenges and passions in your life.  Be balanced, and pursue your interests with intensity. 

When you can find challenges in your life, when you can accept responsibility for who you are and where you want to go, and when you can achieve a balance in your life, I can assure you that you'll find the confidence that you need to achieve your goals.

To learn more, go to Sport Psychology.