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Dying To Be Thin
Which do you think is the lesser of the two evils…“binge drinking” or “binge eating”? Letting yourself get “out of control” whether you're drinking or eating can be very dangerous. When “too much, too soon” of any substance is very quickly put into the body, it creates a powerful amount of stress and strain. Think how much pressure there would be on your own body, both inside and outside, if suddenly, and without stopping, someone put one weight after another on your stomach.

"You look great Katie. Is that a new dress?" her boyfriend, Chris asked.

"Uh huh...my mom bought if for me. I'll be right back you guys," Katherine smiled. When she was out of sight, Janine turned to the others and whispered, "Has anyone ever noticed how Katie excuses herself for like 10 minutes after every meal? I mean seriously, watch her. Lately it is becoming more frequent and we are usually too into our conversation to notice."

"Well, what are you saying Janine?" Chris asked. Katherine was his girlfriend.

"Oh, come on. You of all people should notice. You spend the most time with her. Actually, people with bulimia are really good at hiding their behaviors," she explained.

"Sometimes it's really hard. I mean we are expected to practically be perfect. Those who can't naturally be perfect look for the quick fix. I used to do it on occasion. Katie got so mad at me one day when she caught me, so I doubt she is doing it," Chris said confidently.

"Who are you kidding? People with eating disorders know what they are doing is wrong. It is just that most things in their life are messed up...this is really a way to regain some control. It is not that they don't want to change or that they are not ashamed even, but the compliments and approval they receive along with the feeling of being in control are more important to them. It is a disorder that begins to consume them. All a person with an eating disorder thinks about is food, diet, body image and even exercise," she explained.

"What makes you such an expert? Katie is thin because she eats well and exercises non-stop. She is always at the gym, doing yoga, playing tennis or doing something active," Chris was getting defensive.

"Yet another symptom of bulimia," Janine exclaimed. "And what do you mean she eats well...she just polished off a huge slice of cheesecake. I gain 10 pounds just looking at dessert. The thing is, Katie is not in the dangerous stages yet. There are just certain signs that I see. We may only see her eating healthy, but she binges when nobody is around. I caught her one night when we had a sleepover. She has tiny red spots around her eyes...those are broken blood vessels from throwing up so much. She also mentioned period abnormalities. Trust me guys, we need to do something before it gets too bad." Just then Katherine returned from the bathroom ready with an excuse.

"Sorry it took so long," she looked guilty. "So what are we talking about?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Nothing...just meaningless chitchat. Let's get out of here," Chris said, not wanting anyone to upset her.

"I think I'm just gonna head home. Do you mind? I am kind of tired," Katie looked down at her shoes. She was always breaking plans with her friends. Now that her stomach was empty, she was probably going home to binge. Janine thought to herself that Katherine must be really tormented and lonely. She could never hang out because she had to hide her behaviors.

"Janine...snap out of it. What are you thinking about? We're leaving," Chris shouted. "I called your name like five times."

"Sorry...it's nothing. Let's go."

Bulimia affects both men and women, typically in their late teens and early twenties. Most bulimics are high achievers, straight A students, and good friends. They care what others think of them and care about how they look, so they often commit themselves to stern discipline and strict dieting. But because dieting leaves them hungry and with cravings for certain foods such as sweets and fatty foods, they go on binges (usually in private). Some bulimics go on binges because they feel angry, anxious, bored, lonely or sad. Following the binge, the bulimic then purges, feels guilty about his or her behavior and becomes even more depressed. And so the cycle continues…
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By: Janine Carr

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Cara Nussbaum
MTV's Real World

Cara travels around to schools speaking out about depression and eating disorders.  Find out how these diseases have affected her personally, by clicking here

Eating Disorders

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The Renfrew Center Foundation

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